saya sgt suka!

im hapy! wel,me n baby stil ade prob hbgn,tp we stil cntact n jmp n lyn mcm biase..so,mustila aq hapy kn? hehehe..smlm kn,aq ngn baby g ts shopping..actualy,baby ade beli dis shoe,dats realy nice 4 her,but some1 at her house stole it from her..i dno who,but she suspects some1..pity her..so,she ask me 2 buy 4 her a new 1,aq leh aje,tp she actualy malu nk ask at 1st..watpe nk malu2 kn,da aq mmg slalu blanje die,so no hal la..lgpun,she stil my wife(wel,u noe wat i mean)..so anything 4 her la..so,we g sane,beli her d shoe..aq pun ape lg,shoping la gak..hehehe

aq nk beli bju kmje lg,cuz aq ade 3 jew,so xckup lerw..aq ingt nk beli itam or pth,tp baby kate nk belikn wane pink lak..adooooi..pink?hmm..aq ok je,tp nt my kind of color gak la..hehehe..so,crik punye carik,tebeli bnd laen plak..hehehe..haaaaa..aq beli leather jaket nie..i think its leather la,tp its so unusually soooo cool looking..baby pun notice,tp aq pkr, 'muat ke aq pakai nie?' so,baby choose d best design n i agree on it..so,aq cube la,bpk la..besa gak 2..aq da la pke bju kmje n vest at d tme..aq sarung je la jaket 2 truz,n with d vest n bju,it fits..hehehe

so,i bought dat jaket,n beli kmje pink gak..hehe..den me n baby decide nk g date nx mnth..nk tgk wyg..so,kitorg da agree nk suprise each other wit our dressup..im neves n scared,cuz baby kate 2 suprise her n exceed her expectations with hw i dressup..klu aq xdpt wat cmner???? malu n tkt n neves pun ade gak..tp xpe,aq nk mntk tlg Eyd Saadan..tlg aq yek????? hehehehehehhee

MEMEKAK LA WEEIII!!!!

kat klj aq nie,dak2 junior nie,bpk mmkak..kire cm nk show off la kn..ingt kitorg kat cnie pkk sgt ke smpe korg kne ckp kuat2 sgt,pdhl korg sume dlm lab je..temasuk aq la skang nie..nk mltup telinge aq je..haaaa!!!! pdn muke,amek ko,pengetua da make an appearance..ckp la kuat lg..memekak aje..

pas2 bile klaz e-commerce,dorg duk kat blakang..tau la dat sir kdg2 je ajr,cuz nothing much 2 learn except kne wat blog tuk asgment,tp beragak la klu nk bckp..kne ke kuat sgt,pdhl korg 2 duk bkumpul kat blakang..smpe kat luar org leh dgr..2 bkn bckp da,2 da sah nmenye memekak..tlg la,ingt korg bguz sgt kew..plez la..1 of ur fren pun da kne tgkp cheating in an exam..klu korg nk suceed,ape gune korg nk meniru..in fact,wats d point korg nk cntinue study klu nk gak meniru..tlg la..GROW UP..

nyemak je..huh!!!!!

its a start..

smlm aq ngn baby g pavi..die ajk..kire spontan date la kn..aq xksh,in fact aq hepy ade la..cuz da lme gler xkuar g tgk wyg..2 wyg truz lak 2..haha..kitorg tgk cite Mars need Moms and I Am Number Four..bes gak la cite number 4, mars lak 2, lwk pun ade gak la..sdh pun ade gak..hehehe..

like baby said kn,kitorg stil rpt wlupun kitorg ade prob..tp,dats wat she wants..aq phm..n aq ade tnye die, at first ckp kite xleh nk meet like always,tp d day b4 dat pun kite ade kuar..mksd aq ari isnin la kn..n tuesday nite die ade msj dat she cnt wait 2 met me on wednesday(dat time kitorg plan nk kuar jln2 mlm,tp change of plan wen die ajk aq spontan date..hehe)aq hapy die ckp g2,tp wndering la gak kn..cuz xnk die sdh2..huhu..

n so,mse da blik smlm 2, aq msj la die ape yg aq wndering..die ckp,die hapy kite jmp2 n dpt lpk2 n rpt gak wlupun kite ade problem..die stil sdh n stress,tp die xnk think bout it,cuz if she keeps on thinking bout it 2 much,she wont heal..dats wat she said..n so,i decided not 2 talk bout it,cuz i dnt wana stress her up evn more..cuz she stil taking her asma medicine every nite,n dats really worrying..aq xnk die skt2 lame,especially xnk bdn die 2 dependent on her asma medicine..

evn if shes already healed,n i didnt pop d question yet,d question wer i ask her 2 cme back 2 me,aq leh tggu..klu die ask dlu,aq trime je la..cuz baby ade ckp,evn if she already heal,n i may not yet ask her d question back,she will ask me..as for me,aq pkr nk ask her back bulan 5..on trkh kitorg kapel..aq leh ask her anytime,tp cuz aq pun sdh n terase cuz she end it,aq pun need time n space..which unfortunately,i just realized..cuz d beginning,i just thought of having her back n make things rite,witout evn realizing how i feel..

wel,all i cn do is wait 4 dat time 2 appear..i dnt mind,as long i cn her smile n laugh n i noe,dat shes happy...

Its over..

me n baby,da officialy end.. smlm,aq rindu sgt2 kat die..den aq msj die..saying wat i wana say from d bottom of my heart.. n den, we stat 2 fite, not fite teruk, kire mcm aq gtau die ape aq nk,n die pun gtau ape die nk.. die mmg da xleh nk trime aq blik, cuz die btul2 da ilang trust kat aq... die xnk trime aq blik cuz die da xcye aq n stil hurt sgt2...

den, aq ckp aq nk jmp die... nk setlekn bnd nie face 2 face... ok, we meet mlm smlm... kitorg lpk kat dlm kete jew... aq ckp, aq phm klu die xnk trime aq, n die xtrust aq, aq phm... so, in order to ease her pain, aq stuju ngn cdgn die... we just b close frens je... tp, in my heart n her heart, honestly die ckp, die mmg xnk kwn ngn aq... bkn ape, kitorg xpnh bkwn... so its a weird thing 4 d both of us... dlu kitorg knl pun, cuz we r junior n senior... aq junior n die senior, aq form 3 dat time n she is form 5 dat time... so, die pun ckp, we r not frens, we r just close 2 each other... but not a kapel... kite bedua just rpt, cuz dlm 5 thun kite 2getr, die byk cite psl mslh die kat aq n aq pun same... kire kitorg mmg da knl sgt2... n cuz of dat, die xnk jawo dr aq... die kate we cn stil met, but not always like we used 2, cuz she need time n space... but, if anything dat aq nk ckp, smthing impotant or aq ade mslh, die kate aq leh contact die... n so does she...

die kate die stil nk stay ngn aq, live 2gter ngn aq, cuz die xde org laen yg lg rpt ngn die selain aq... aq tnye die, bole ke stay wit me, cuz aq tkt die stil hurt ke ape... n myb die nk stay wit 1 of her bff ke, ila nme die... die kate die xnk, die nk stay ngn aq gak no mater wat... lgpun die xnk stay kat umah ngn fmly die da... cuz dats her goal, 2 live away from her fmly... ok, i undestand... den, things lighten up a bit, cuz aq ade gurau2 ngn die skit2, n die pun same... den kitorg g mcd, aq blanje die eskem... kite mkn, den aq hulurkn tgn aq n say ''we start over?'' n die slm tgn aq... (tp actualy at first die xphm ape aq ckp..hehehe) evnthough kitorg jmp smlm, n die pndg aq, tp actualy die force herself 2 look at me... aq notice dat, cuz mate die sdh sgt... n aq tau hw her face reaction is klu die sdh... aq dpn2 ckp, klu xleh pndg org, jgn la pndg... tp die kate, xpe... org nk gak... dgl gak...hehehe

d reason i wana end dis pun,cuz aq xnk wat die ngs lg... evnthough aq sdh 2 do dis, n i do it against my will, cuz i still want her back, but i had 2 do it... cuz die ary2 ngs, n ary2 amek ubt asma... dats d main reason i wana end it... aq xnk die suffer lg truk... aq nk die calm down n kurgkn amek ubt asma... aq xnk, die kne asma lg truk, n knowing dat im d cause dat she having asma agen, it hurts me evn more, cuz not only i hurt d peson that im totally in love wit, i made her suffer wit her asma condition... i dnt want dat 2 hapen... dats y, its beter dis way... 2 mke her hapy n 2 mke her ok...

aq ade ckp, evnthough we nt kapel anymore, i wil always wait 4 u... die pun tnye blik, klu btul cm2, aq xkn nyesal ke cuz tggu die? aq jwb, '' i wont regret it..'' cuz dats d truth, sape lg yg aq ade selaen die... sape lg yg aq syg n cinta sgt2 selaen die... sape lg yg boleh msuk idup aq cm2 je? no one can... in my heart n mind, ders only her... den i ask her, would she find sme1 else 2? she say no... ders no 1 else cn just capture her heart like dat... 2 be honest, im glad wen she says dat...

n so, 2day is my first day being only a close peson 2 her... i stil feel a dead weight on my chest, yet im gona live wit it... i stil wear our ring, cuz its a reminder 2 me dat, how ive lost her, hw i hurt her n its prove dat shes my wife, n she will always b d peson dat i love... although she say, i dont need 2 wear it anymore, i say, im still gona wear it... cuz its a reminder 2 me, hw ive lost sme1 as perfect as her, who is so loving n caring n wonderful...

boleh tp xboleh..

hmm..smlm 1 ary xmsj baby lgsg..rindu gler kat baby..tp aq phm,aq xleh msj die..cuz smlm die kuar jln2 ngn bff die..dr kol bape aq xtau,tp d day b4 dat die kate kol 12 tgh hari, til kol 2 lbh pagi td..so,die smpe umah exactly kol 2.50 am.. i noe dis cuz aq ngah waiting 4 her msj..nk ensure die da blik safely..hehe

aq set alarm kol 2.30 am, just 2 ensure yg die da blik..tp cuz aq mlm smlm xleh nk tdo sgt,aq tgje byk kl la..pas2 msj die kol 2.26 am tnye die da blik umah ke lom..pas2 die bls lom,n so i wait til die msj kol 2.50am.. aq nye la blik, 'lmbt blik?'.. den die bls ' i told u, i blik kol 2 lbh cm2 rite?'.. mmg la,tp aq risau la kn..huhu

n so,skang nie lak,a ingt nk msj die..tp aq cm doubt,tkt cuz aq will make her evn more sad..tp aq msj gak,cuz nk tnye smthing impotant..so,msj jap,pas2 da xmsj.. den aq bkk fb die,rindu sgt.. tgk2 die pun o9,cuz die ngah upload gbr2 die g becuti kat cameron.. aq tgk la gbr2 die, mmg lawa..die lawa,sexy n cute.. suke aq tgk.. pas2 aq msj die,ckp die lawa,n gtau dat,some of the picx die te-upload 2 kali..hehehe

so,we msj 4 awhile, ckp bout her gbr,die ok skit la..pas2 bile da xde tpc 2, aq tnye, ' b leh ke msj baby nie?'.. die kate, 'boleh,tp u will noe hw im gona feel..' truz aq anta msj, ' ok2,im sory..i wont msj u agen..tke cre..love u..' aq bru ingt nk bek2 ngn die skit.. tp,nk wat cmner..da baby stil hurt.. so,i don wana push it..beter wait 4 it..

wait 4 hw long? i realy dont have d answer.. only she can answer dat question...

its a hard time..

its been 7 days, 1 week la in short..since me n her broke up..its so hard 2 face wat happened..n its all my fault..aq wat die sdh,wat die hurt sgt2, aq xjge ati die..sume cuz aq selfish..aq mmg xde niat lgsg nk wat die skit ati ngn aq..tp slalu je jd..sume sbb aq selfish..im a promise breaker..n cuz of dat,i break her heart..i love her so much,i love her wit all my heart..yet im unable to take cre of her heart..

da byk kl aq pthkn jnji aq..die hurt,tp ok blik..den aq stat blik..den die hurt,den ok blik..byk kl da..dis time,die da xleh nk thn..so,die break up wit me..aq mmg la sdh n tkejut,tp aq phm y die mntk ptus..sume aq yg slh..

aq nk die blik..tp die msih lg hurt ngn aq,so die xtau wen she wil cme back 2 me..its all depends on time, she says..she wants me back 2,yet she's stil hurt,n have a trust issue wit me..cuz she completely lost her trust in me..i understand y it happened..she needs time n space,i gave her dat..yet,i miss her so much..i miss her too much that im tempted to msj her..tp aq thn,aq xnk kcu die n xnk wat die ngs..

aq bru je pkr nk jmp die rbu nie,2 ask her 2 cme back 2 me,tp sbb ary ahd,da jmp jap,cuz die blik dr cameron becuti ngn family,die kate die hapy jmp aq..yet at d same time,die rase painful n hurt sgt2 bile jmp aq..cuz die pkr bout wat hapen..bile die msj cmnie smlm,hancur hati aq nk ask her back rbu nie..aq rse cm,msih jawo lg utk kite 2 b 2geter..i dnt want 2 wait 2 long,but if it has come 2 dis,i will wait 4 u baby..